Ups and Downs

To say that this trip started off on the right foot would be an understatement. Presently we find ourselves in the United Airlines Polaris Lounge which is reserved for passengers traveling exclusively in that Class. This is the one with those Personal Pods and Lay-Flat Snoozer Seats.

                        The ONLY aspects of this trip that are of any concern are the flying parts. NOT because I am afraid of flying, quite the opposite…. I’ve done aerobatics in a Stearman Bi-Plane, flew a WWII AT-6 and countless other cool aircraft courtesy of my Chatterbox partner Steve. I’ve even flown a 727! So, as you may surmise, flying is not the issue.

                        Sitting is the issue.

                        And for those of you that have known me for more than an hour or so, know my Restless Leg Syndrome (RLS) can be debilitating at times. This is an affliction that I do take medication for, and it is majorly effective….. most of the time. But sitting in an airplane row with limited room to move around, the Fasten Seat Belt sign glaring me in the face, and the guy who I am positive is the Air Marshall eyeing me up while secretly fingering the trigger on the howitzer hidden in his jacket.

            I hope that he uses it on me and puts me out of my misery.

                        You may think that this is an exaggeration…..

                        I can assure you that it is not!

                        It’s not that I won’t sit down, it’s that I can’t sit down.

                        And…. a full-blown Panic/Claustrophobic-type Attack may end up being the result.  Queue the Xanax.

            So, as you can surmise, seating on an aircraft is more important to me than most people. I always opt for the (now more expensive) exit row seats, because there is gobs of leg room there and the only extra thing that I need to do is help open the door, etc. in case of emergency. As an aside, I’m the guy that you really want there because even as a kid on the school bus I sat up front and studied all the controls and switches in case the driver was incapacitated, I would know what to do.

                        Another good spot is one of the bulkhead rows with no seats in front of you. Usually there is extra leg room there also. Occasionally I’ve been fortunate to scoff up a First-Class seat last minute when they just want to get a few more shekels out of someone willing to shell them out. This option comes with some other perks like FREE (all you can eat) snacks! And the good ones too…. endless Stroopwafels for your enjoyment!

                        Back to this flight. We did have a bulkhead seat with the middle one still unsold as of yesterday. Yahoo! But….. when I went on to check us in, there were some ‘offers’ to upgrade to Polaris Class. We had (just for fun) asked about this for the upcoming Baltic/Poland trip….. it was available for an extra $8500.00….uh…. no thanks. So, we never expected this to ever be an option.

                        But I think I’ve got this business figured out…. with absolutely no way to verify this theory:

                        Fact: there is no better industry than the airlines that have the down and dirty numbers on the amounts of passengers on a flight, i.e. how many open seats are available in any given class at any given time. They also know, just by the experiential numbers of past passengers, that ‘X’ percentage are willing to move seats, upgrade, cancel, etc.

            This all leaves them with an algorithm that dictates their moves, and motives, come a day or so before departure. Well, I guess that we hit that jackpot and there must have been enough open Polaris Class seats available that they knew that they needed to make a proposition that, as Don Corleone (Marlon Brando) so persuasively said, “I’m gonna make you an offer you can’t refuse!”

                        So, here we sit in the Polaris Class Lounge in the Houston Airport that is even better than the usual United Lounge (which is very pleasant in its own right!) having a very nice breakfast, just waiting to board and by now you’ve correctly surmised that we are not in our Economy Bulkhead seats but in fact in 10D and 10F which are in the middle row, both on the aisle,  and have a nifty Privacy Screen between them (if you don’t happen to know your neighbor!)

                        +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

                        Getting acclimated to these new surroundings is just a little daunting but we are not complaining! There are so many ‘amenities’ that are included with these seats that it seems a tad cluttered. Two blankets, two different pillows, a bag filled with toiletry-type items, slippers, and even pajamas upon request! Stashing all these things in spaces that we are unaccustomed to made getting boarded early almost a necessity, but it all worked out, things were squished into tight little spaces, or in some cases, folks just dove in, covered up and went to sleep. We had our Four-Course meal that was very good, and I can report to you that the Triple Chocolate Mousse cake is excellent!

                        But…… (here it comes)

                        I spoke too soon.

                        You know that it is not good when the Captain gets on the PA system when everything is running smoothly and there are no apparent problems. He was not talking to us to show us something out the windows. He was letting us know that we would be detouring to San Francisco for a “maintenance” issue. He said that we were in no danger now, but the correct course of action would be to address it before we headed out over the north Pacific Ocean. We have no idea what it is, how it may be fixed, whether we will need to de-plane or not, but in a short period of time I think that we’ll have some answers. I am quite sure that the folks on the ground are working diligently to mitigate any more negative circumstances.

                        In the meantime there is always some extra Xanax!

            Wait! Another announcement!

                        Blah-blah-blah blah…………

                        Well, we learned that we would be landing in San Francisco, the time, temp, and winds there, just as if it was our final destination! I wish that we had just a little more info!

                        ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

                        Remember back at the start of this Post I said that it was an understatement to say that we had started out on the right foot? I wish that I could take that back now, but only slightly, because these seats are AWESOME !!!!!

            But there is an excellent possibility that we are going to miss our connecting flight to Hanoi. Originally, we had about a three-hour layover and that buffer has been consumed by our detour to San Francisco when we had to make a hard left instead of the shorter route of going up over Alaska and then down to Japan, and don’t forget the time spent in San Francisco transferring to another plane. I do have to complement United on this swap of aircraft, we came into G-4, disembarked, walked two gates to G-2 where our identical aircraft was already waiting for us, and waited for the replacement cockpit crew to arrive. The whole shebang went off without a hitch, so that was the positive of the negative. It turns out that there was an issue with the air handling system. When the outside temps are hovering around negative 60 degrees, and close to 300 peeps are aboard all very inconsiderately breathing….. well I guess that the a/c unit is quite important and the judicious decision that was made was the correct one.

                        The confusing part right about now is determining what time it is. While the physical time set by a time Zone is easy to pinpoint, determining the “Feels Like” time is a little more difficult. We caught the 6:30 jitney bus over to the airport and started to board around 9:30.   After flying North Westward for about two hours, we made that hard left to get San Franscico. I re-set my watch there for West Coast time which didn’t really make too much of a difference. BTW, at that time, the Tokyo time was something that I can’t configure as my real time now feels like about 2:30 am and I can barely keep my eyes open. I checked the In-Flight Guidance System on the video screen in front on me and it seems that we are due south of Anchorage, Alaska, headed to cross the Aleutian Islands soon and we still have 6 hours and 39 minutes to go, but who’s counting!   (And that’s just to Tokyo!)

                        Wait! I’ve got it figured out! Right now, it is 8:50 pm in Texas, 11:50 AM (tomorrow) in Tokyo and Hanoi is two hours earlier at 9:50 AM cuz it’s further West of Tokyo and an additional seven-hour plane ride which we won’t know if we’re going to make until we actually arrive in Tokyo.  

                        I think that I’ll end this blathering missive of a Post because I’m getting punchy and I am having quite the time backspacing the random letters that appear because I fall asleep with my finger on a letter and make about five rows of them before I get startled awake. When it gets Posted, only time will tell, as a regular schedule I have yet to establish. 

 Good night for nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

                                                                                                                                                                                               

(Many hours later)      

PS Arrived in Tokyo, staying at a nifty hotel, the Hotel Nikko Narita courtesy of United. I have to say that United was very organized and accommodating when we arrived. They had big tables all set up at the end of the jetway and staffed accordingly. Our Vouchers and our new flight arrangements were all there waiting for us. The hotel is magnificent and we’ll be back at the airport (only 5 minutes away) early tomorrow morning!