Month: February 2022

(Soon!)

Four weeks and counting.

          March 31 marks the beginning of The Great Circumnavigation of the Lower forty-Eight as a Way to get Back East to New Jersey to Visit with Friends and Family Trip.        

          It took me longer to write that than the entire trip will take.

          Well, not really as we plan on being on the road for all of April, May, and part of June.

          We start from Texas and arrive two days later at Tomboy Farm, that sprawling southwest Colorado ranch, home to my daughter Lorelyn and her husband Travis, along with all of our critter friends that we’ve kept watch over in the past. (Read “Lunch at 18,000 Ft” November 2021)

          After about a week there we will proceed into the unknown territories, namely Nevada, where the fortunes (?) of Las Vegas await us and our paltry spending habits.

          I am sure that the Casinos will be trying to out-do each other with complimentary stays in their Presidential Suites and many other perks reserved only for the Big Rollers, but we will politely decline as we will have our home-on-wheels with us, so no need to succumb to their temptations.

          A few days (and a few shows?) later we will head down the I-15 and arrive in Long Beach, California where we will be for about 5 days. I used to live just over the hill from Long Beach, in Palos Verdes, and even through that was back in 1963/64, I still know my way around and cannot wait to get there. Southern California sightseeing and a trip to Catalina Island are on our itinerary while we are there.

          Next up is Sequoia National Park, (where, back in the day,  Lorelyn was a Ranger). I’ve been there before and cannot wait to get back! You cannot fathom the size of these trees until you see them and feel their massiveness in person. It’s fun to drive up the access road with someone who has never been there before because the trees that you encounter along the way are gigantic in their own right,

          “Wow! Are these them?”

          “Nope, those are Douglas Firs,”

          “But they are huge!”

          “I know, but just wait.”

          “How about that one? Is that a Sequoia?”

          “Wrong again Mr. Bunyan, That’s a Ponderosa Pine.”

          “But it’s gigantic!”

          “I know, just wait….”

          It’s going to be fun  😊

          From the heights of the incredible Sierra Nevada, where Sequoia is located, we head down and westward towards the coast where we will be staying at several wineries in the Caso Robles area. Similar to its northern cousins, Sonoma and Napa, this region has many fine wineries and is adjacent to the mid-California Coast where the plan is  to get to William Randolph Hearst’s palatial home in San Simeon.

          Next we travel back across the state to visit Yosemite National Park, again in the Sierra Nevada. Luckily we are attempting this voyage while school is still in session as the sights that we are planning to visit are among the most popular in the Country. With any amount of luck, we’ll be able to experience them without too much of the crowd. It’s a good thing that we don’t mind getting early starts! But not everything that we are going to is travel-frenzied, so having just regular days mixed in will be nice.

          After that our next destination is Monterey and its famous peninsula on the Coast.

          So now you’re saying to yourself, “Hold on, who’s planning this journey? A blind man? They were just on the Coast a few days ago!”

          Right you are Columbus! But there is a road closure on the Coast Highway that precludes us from traveling directly there. It’s like being in Maine where they say, “Ya can’t get theah from heah.”

          So we do the next best thing and crisscross the state  in order to work our way north to San Francisco and its environs.

          It’s at this point of our sojourn that we do not have any planned stays yet. We need to leave some room for changes that may be necessary because we want them to be necessary! But, no worries, there are plenty of Harvest Host places to overnight in and as long as we can visit a campground once  week to dump the holding tanks we will be just fine.

          The rest of the trip is as follows, not too many details yet as we still need to research some things, but it will basically follow this route:

          Northern California

          Oregon and the Coast

          Washington State, Seattle, Mt. St Helens

          Montana, Yellowstone,

          North Dakota

          Minnesota

          Wisconsin

          Upper Michigan Peninsula and Mackinaw Island

          Michigan regular

          Ohio, Air Force Museum, Dayton

          Pittsburg, Frank Lloyd Wright House “Falling Water”

          Niagara Falls

          Finger Lakes and Cooperstown

          Finally, New Jersey, sometime in mid-June.

          The opportunities for writing about all of this is quite exciting for me, and of course, photographing everything along the way.

          So, as they say in travel parlance, “Fasten your seatbelts!”

          It should be a good ride, happy to have you along!

We’re on our way back to Texas after our circumnavigation of the Florida Peninsula and Paula is driving so I’m taking this opportunity to write a bit. I usually do this around 4 AM, but today is a “Travel Day” which means that we start a bit earlier.

          One of the wonderful things about this mode of travel and lifestyle is meeting other people along the way. I know that we all meet folks in our daily lives, and this is not to disparage any of those relationships, or to insinuate that the only way to meet interesting people is to travel.

          What does happen is that the people that we meet are, by and large, not from “around here,” they are usually from “somewhere else.”        This makes for interesting conversations because one immediately tries to establish some common ground to talk about and in our case (and most others doing this) it involves Travel, and where we’ve been, and/or going.

          This exercise has the potential for coming across as “Can you top this,” but it’s all good-natured and most of the time we’ve gleaned good, solid information about places that we’re looking to go to, and in turn, were able to assist others going to places that we’ve been to.

          So there we were in the pool at the KOA last week.

          It’s not hard to start a conversation with random adults who are standing in five feet of crystal clear, nicely warmed, vacation water.         Soon you find yourself divulging deep, dark, family secrets because you know that you’ll probably never see these water-logged specimens again!

          Anyway, we met a couple from Fairbury, Illinois. They own a specific-to-trades hardware store. It’s a family-run business so right there we had something in common. It turns out that they are part of the Harvest Hosts program that we belong to. To you new readers, this is an organization that places like wineries, breweries, farms, and businesses, belong to. These people open up their parking spots for a few RV’ s each night. No services, just a parking spot, but it beats the random Walmart mostly because its usually interesting and we are always assured of a hearty welcome there.

          We explained our plans for the upcoming summer and eventual return to Texas in the fall. It turns out that we can pass right by their establishment on our way to St. Louis in September.

          It will be fun to give them a call and say, “Hey! Remember us from the KOA pool?”

           I’m sure that we’ll receive a glorious welcome!

          We also met a few of Paula’s relatives that she had not seen in a long time, and for some of these long-lost relations, that time span was almost 25 years. To say that the reunions were joyful would be an understatement!

          For me, this was the first time that I had met most of them. While Paula and her nieces caught up with each other, it left the girls spouses, just wanting a conversation with another guy (me!).

          This is the ‘Random” part that I alluded to earlier. There is just no way that these guys and me would have ever gotten together. After meeting them, I can definitely imagine being friends with them if we had lived there and I look forward to another visit in the future.

          I’m sure that it will be in less than 25 years!

          My first example of common ground involves my keen observational skills. One of the guys and his boys, were wearing Star Wars tee shirts.

          Ok, now I see my opportunity.

          “Love the shirts guys!”

          “Yea, we love ‘em too, we’re big Star Wars fans!

          Hah! Now I’ve got them. I know for a fact that my next statement will be met with ‘oohs and ahhs’ after I deliver it.

          “Me too, I’ve seen the original or what’s now referred to as “A new Hope – Star Wars IV, well over 250 times!

          I received the reaction that I was expecting, and the sense of reverence that accompanies this revelation.

          We’re on!

          What I did not expect was the drill-down on all of the latest Star Wars spin-offs, books, etc. These guys were good! We parried back and forth,  and I held my own on some of the examples like Bobba Fett and The Mandalorian, but after that I was completely outclassed!

          John and the Boys 1……  Don, 0.

          Where you are sitting at the table either lends itself, or constrains oneself, in the conversation department. While I was able to have that meaningful trouncing at the hands of the Star Wars Extreme Fan Club, John’s cousin-in-law, Robert, was down at the other end of the table. Seeking a way to draw him into the conversation, I listened for some hints when he spoke. Soon I heard the word “Hanger.”

                    I sensed an opening.

                    “Robert, are you in aviation?”

                   “Nah, we just have a helicopter at work. I’m with the county mosquito control  commission. We’ve got the chopper, some ATV’s and an air boat.”

          Still too far away and not wanting to try and talk across the girls and their reminiscing, I filed this away for after the meal. He had said the magic word, Airboat!  I’ve wanted one of these babies since seeing and I had a chance to flesh out our conversation.one back on the old mid 60’s TV series, Flipper, which was coincidently shot here in Florida.

          After lunch we went out on the coolest deck I’ve ever seen at a restaurant. It was here that Robert and I had a chance to flesh out our conversation. I learned tons about mosquitos (the ultimate bane of my existence) and all the specialized equipment that they use to battle the little bastards.

                Guess where the very first mosquito control program was in the Country?

          Nope!

          Wrong again!

          Yup! New Jersey! The Meadowlands!

          We probably would frown on their (non-environmentally friendly) tactics these days but it was a start.

          So, this restaurant, The River Grille, had probably the best outdoor set-up of any place that I’ve seen. Various levels, bar areas, open, covered, umbrellaed, built around large trees coming through the deck, I could just imagine this place when it was really hopping!

          There was a large dock area for boats to pull up to and for the landlubbers to go down to and feed the aquatic critters. They also had a few fun signs down there.

          One read,

                             No Shoes?

                             No Shirt?

                             Problem!

          This one was my favorite, apparently they need to remind the somewhat inebriated folks of this…..

          Oh.. and the food was really good too!

          The previous day we met up with another group of nieces, nephews, and Paula’s sister-in-law. Again, I had met a few of these fine folks a while ago but only briefly. Face Book has done a wonderful job of keeping people together and somewhat apprised of the goings-on in a person’s life, but you have to admit that there is no substitute for an in-person get-together and a chance to actually hug someone! We had a down-home good ‘ole spaghetti dinner which, of course, was delicious.

          We met again the next morning for breakfast at Cracker Barrel for another non-dietetic meal  😊

          It was at this table that I was able to sit next to Jerry, who had not been at the dinner the night before. Jerry is one of those people that you never forget, for all the right reasons.

          Again, a “guy-type” conversion ensued. I can hold my own with topics on cars, bikes, aircraft, history, and a myriad of other innocuous topics, but Jerry took all of this to a new level with his experiences.

          Jerry was an Army Ranger and as such is ‘Jump Certified.”  (Jerry, if you are reading this, I would like to thank you for your Service, I am sorry that I did not think to thank you in person)

          Jerry belongs to a group of guys that jump from a venerable, old, C-47 named the Tico Belle, that actually saw action over Normandy on D-Day and still has some bullet holes memorialized and preserved in her. Jerry showed me a video clip from their last jump. I thought that I was watching an old war movie, the guys all standing up, clipped to the static line, with the Jumpmaster standing in front of the barking orders and gesturing to them when the time came to exit the aircraft . In what seemed like a split second all ten of the guys were gone.

          Looking out of the plane, down and to the rear, you could see the chutes opening and the line of jumpers trailing each other downward.

          And they used the old-school types of chutes, the big, round, mushroom shaped ones. It was about as authentic as it gets.

          We had a great conversation about old war birds, I was able to recount my flight on an old B-17 with my grandson, and the time that I flew an AT-6 for an hour.

          The best part of watching Jerry was how he treated others. He is a disciple (a good word here) of Judo and all of the philosophies and traditions that it adheres to. I am not an expert on the topic of martial arts by any stretch of the imagination, but I do know that they propound to exemplify control, respect, and a host of other benefits. I observed Jerry personify his religion in his interactions with all of us. To the untrained eye, he would just appear courteous, but after listening to him speak about what he does, I could then see where all of his actions stemmed from.

          It was a pleasure to witness Jerry and it does give one pause to realize how we all conduct ourselves in our daily lives.

          Thanks for indulging me on this topic of “Random Acquaintances,”

          I am really looking forward to the next person that I haven’t met yet, who may have an impact on my life!

The KOA Campground that we are staying at is nothing short of magnificent. KOA’s are divided into three levels, each with its specific criteria so that you know what you are getting.

          The first are  KOA Journey’s which are generally located near major travel corridors which allows you to hop on and off the highway, spend a night and then proceed merrily on your way having had just the basics offered to you.

          The second  ones are KOA Holiday’s which have upgraded amenities, usually a clubhouse with a bar and a bit more in the recreation department.

          The third ones are KOA Resorts which can best be described as a cruise on land, lots of planned activities for both adults and kids, again with a few more recreational additions.

          The one we are at, KOA Sugarloaf Key / Key West, is in the Holiday category and for the life of us, we cannot figure out why it doesn’t qualify for the Resort level.

          This place is immaculate, and you can see why when you observe the Staff hard at work to keep it that way.

          There is a rather unique level of social engagement associated with this type of travel and living. Obviously we are with a group of like-minded folks which just starts the possibilities. The difference here is that unlike a resort on land, or even a cruise, unless you happen to bump into your neighbors as they enter or exit their rooms, there is no way to interact with them. Here, along with the communal areas, each site has its own “patio” type area that is, at best, “semi”-private. When I’m outside coming or going, working on the motorhome, or just sitting around, my neighbors are there also, and EVERYONE says “Hello!”  We all have signs (and license plates) proclaiming who we are and where we hail from which always sparks a conversation.

          Topics range from, “My kids live near there,” or “What type of tire dressing do you use?” to “I love your patio lights, where did you get them?” Everyone is more than convivial and outgoing when it comes to meeting others. It makes for a very enjoyable stay.

          KOA’s are franchises so the chances of meeting the owners are very good. These places are part of the Hospitality industry, and we have found that owners and staff alike seem to enjoy being in this business and treat you accordingly, not unlike your crew when on a cruise.

          I guess that you could describe the concept of the KOA family of campgrounds to the venerable old stand-by of roadside accommodations, Howard Johnson’s.

          You always knew what to expect when traveling and came upon that Orange Roofed Oasis. It was not the Plaza, but then, it was also not Plaza priced! There are some really bad campgrounds out there and Google Maps rating stars has helped weed them out, but for us, we first look for a KOA Campground wherever we go and have yet to be disappointed.

          You can come join us on the road! Most places have some cabins and some tent sites, so you don’t need an RV!

          See you soon?  😊

The Publix Supermarket in Key West yesterday was the scene of both Euphoric Highs and Dismal Lows when we stopped there to procure some eggs and my very elusive, go-to, manly, alcoholic beverage of choice, Strawberry Wine Coolers.

          We had just spent an enjoyable day in Key West and were on our way back to Sugarloaf Key where our KOA Campground was located when we spied the Publix and pulled in.   

          For those of you in New Jersey, I will elaborate on the purchasing procedures for beer, wine, and spirits. It seems that most other states allow the supermarkets, convenience stores, and yes, even drive-thru’s to sell Beer and Wine. The Hard Stuff needs to be bought at a liquor store. We weren’t sure where Wine Coolers fell in this calculated dichotomy of delineation, but since there was a liquor store adjacent to the Publix, we were assured that our quest could be fulfilled.

          Imagine our delight when upon inquiry, we found that the Wine Coolers were conveniently located in the same aisle as the Eggs!

          How thoughtful of them! Apparently they knew that most out-of-towners would enter their establishment looking for the two staples in most peoples lives, that being eggs and beer!

          Unfortunately, this aisle is also the witness to the Dismal Low of the day.

          For there, directly above the Eggs, were several small packages of fresh Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Morsels!

          Or so I thought.

          Upon closer investigation, my  delight was dashed upon the squeaky-clean floors like a gallon of milk that burst open upon impact.

          For there in front of me were several packages of Quail Eggs.

          I submit these photos of proof that this was in fact, an evil, well-thought-out plan perpetrated on the same unsuspecting out-of-towners that were so happily served until this latest episode made its way forward.

          Dejectedly we (I) started for the check-out area when Paula asked, “I wonder if the have those Butterscotch Krimpets? You know, the ones that I’ve been searching for!”

          It seems that Paula has had a hankerin’ for these little guys since Sixth Grade and for one reason or another, has not either run across them, or has neglected to actually pick them up when her impulsive taste buds demanded.

          “Who knows?” was my reply, fresh off the Quail Eggs Debacle.

          We sauntered down the appropriate aisle and, lo and behold, there was her quest, just waiting for a little kid to come by and pluck them off of the neatly stacked shelf and bring them Home so they could fulfill their mission of sating the impulsive appetite of that Sixth Grader, or, just maybe, the Sixth Grader that’s in all of us.

          That was our Euphoric High!

          As you can see, it doesn’t take much to impart massive mood swings upon us!

          Back in the car we happily recounted that day’s itinerary with fondness.

          We had been to Key West a few years ago and loved every minute of it. So, we were content to just wander around with no particular places to go. The Historic District is where all of the action is. This area has Mallory Square where EVERYONE gathers EVERY night for Sunset. It is quite the spectacle, both naturally and publicly, as both the Sunset and Street Entertainers vie for your attention.

          All of the cool bars and watering holes, such as, Sloppy Joe’s (a favorite of Hemingway’s), and the Green Parrott are located. This town probably compares with Old New Orleans  for the title of Drunken Debauchery at times.

          It’s part of what this place is, but it’s innocuous at the same time

          You can walk practically everywhere and there is one of those Historic Trolley Tour’s that can give you a basic idea of where things are and you are treated to a running historic commentary. The tour of Ernest Hemingway’s home is a must. I would not be surprised if the docents there needed to pass a Comprehensive Hemingway Examination, complete with quotes from his works, to be even considered for a job there.

          They are that good!

          One of the other sites is the Little White House, a favorite of  Harry Truman’s. Here again, the docents are quite proficient in their knowledge, and appreciation, for the guy who said,

          “The Buck Stops Here.”

          It would probably be a good idea for Presidents to be experts in Harry’s ways, who would not even use a government-paid-for-stamp when he mailed a letter back to his wife when he was away.

          ‘Nuff said.

          We had a great lunch at Caroline’s which is mostly outdoors.           Probably half of the eateries down here have some sort of outdoor dining room, most with a collection of various tents and well-placed umbrellas to shelter their customers from both the heat and the rain.

          It makes for a very pleasurable dining experience and as you may imagine, being stuck way out at sea, also makes for some incredibly fresh and tasty seafood meals!

          We most assuredly walked far more than our “10,000 steps” but it is so nice walking under the banyan trees and other quite mature species that the ambling around town has a feeling of quaintness that can only be found in nice, old, southern towns.

          When we arrived back at (on?) Sugarloaf Key and our motorhome, we quickly ripped open a Butterscotch Krimpet and devoured it as only people on Holiday can! After that we decided to partake of the giant hot tub to soothe our walking muscles. There we met people from all over and had several nice conversations. We’ve found that a lot of folks stay at these places down here for a month at a time and then go to another spot until winter is over. They are just as enthralled with our “Full-Time-Motor Homing” as we are with their wintertime get-away itineraries.

          Forty-Five minutes later, water-logged and overheated, we exited the hot tub and made our way back to our site for more Krimpets and a well-deserved Strawberry Wine Cooler.

          All is good in the Florida Keys!

Paula and I got back into our car, and I said, “If I lived here, my new best friend Bill and I would be out sailing every day.”

          Apparently Bill felt the same way because when he and Kim went back to their car he said something to the effect of, “Why can’t my new friend Don live nearby?”

          These two comments uttered simultaneously twenty minutes after meeting each other, probably came to somewhat of a relief to both Kim and Paula. When two great friends from High School get together eons later, one must ponder the fact that the two other people in attendance will either be just two lugs left in the dust as the girls re-live the glory years, or they actually strike out on their own and have a totally independent, genuine, and pleasurable conversation based on  new-found mutual interests.

          Boats and tools.

          Now before you go and say something like, “Duhhh!”

                   “Two guys?”

                   “Boats and tools?”

                   “What a stretch!”

          Let me explain.

          Not just, “Yea, my brother has a boat and sometimes I go out with him”

          More like, “Are you familiar with the Cape Dory 28?”

          “Yea! That’s a sweet design, I love the full keel on it!”

          Our conversation went on with references thrown back and forth with reckless abandon about, J-Boats, Sparkman and Stevens (Classic sailboat designers and builders), old wooden boats and their care, (I love the smell of a good spar varnish!”) joiners and planers, (Bill is a craftsman, cabinet making is one of his specialties).

          I believe that I’ve made my point here and will not belabor you with any more detail. Suffice to say that if Paula and Kim had any concerns about “if the boys would get along”, well, as you can tell, those fears were totally unfounded.

          We are on our way to Sugarloaf Key, and we knew that we would practically drive through Pensacola, Florida. That’s where Kim (and Bill) have lived for the past thousand years or so. Paula and Kim attended Montville High and have remained in Facebook Contact since then. Paula did travel here about eleven years ago with another mutual friend for a long weekend.

          So, we obviously made plans to overnight here in the ‘Walmart of Gulf Breeze’. We made plans to meet up down by the beach at the “Beach Ball”, a water tower painted as such. This place is everything that you’d want a seaside town to be, not a shortage of any desirable shore amenities.

          The beaches, which are right on the Gulf of Mexico,  are incredibly gorgeous as you can see from these photos.

          We went to dinner at a place named “Peg-Legged Pete’s” where we had cheeseburgers!

          No way! We had some really great seafood as you can expect from a seaside town plopped directly on the Gulf!

          After dinner we went back to the motorhome because Kim and Bill wanted to see what it was all about.

          On our way there we made a tiny side-trip to visit Kim’s kindergarten classroom.

           It was the highlight of the evening. 😊

          Kim has been teaching for something like 47 years and for anyone who knows teaching, after a while you get burned out.

          Totally natural.

          The key is to know when you are burned out and exit gracefully as much for the kids sake as one’s own.

          As you can see from these photos, and if you had been able to hear Kim talk about her “Brainiacs” in her classroom, you would harbor no fears that the dreaded “Burn Out” was forthcoming any time soon!

          Quite the contrary! This is a case where the kids and the school will truly be at a loss when Kim finally decides to put the chalk down.

          Back at the motorhome we regaled Kim and Bill with “Tales from the Highway” and showed a few photos of such. We explained the day-to-day living in a 400 square foot  “House” and the pro’s and (not many!) cons of life on the road.

          Photos taken, it was time to say good-night as we had a nine-hour day in front of us before our next stop in Sun City, where Barb, Paula’s sister lives,

          Gotta Go, Time to start driving!

It’s funny how when you re-trace your steps and cover ground that you’ve been over before, that your initial impressions and reactions seem somewhat exaggerated and well, frankly, kind of silly.

          We are starting our Traveling Season with a quick jaunt to Florida which brings us back over a road that we drove westward on in October of 2020, namely the accursed Interstate 10. Regular Readers of this blog will immediately recognize this evil highway from the plethora of posts that have spewn forth from this Angstified Driver.

          In the post titled “Goin’ Down the Bayou“, from that same month, I described the traversing of the swamp on this ‘bane of my existence’ road as it were, as somewhat harrowing.

          It runs for millions of miles above a gigantic ‘gator filled swamp, where I know that the ‘gators are just waiting for some nincompoop to make just the tiniest of mistakes and go careening over the sides, crashing through the balsa-wood fake guardrails that they have installed there apparently just for looks.

          At least that’s the way I saw it from my seat.

          My front seat height is the same as any eighteen-wheeler’s.

          So, when we are driving on roads like this, we look out over the guardrail and down onto all of the awaiting Alligators, not like in a car where when you look to your side, you can imagine that the guardrails will hold you back because you are at their same height, not towering over them, waiting for the laws of physics like, center-of-gravity and momentum, just waiting with anticipation to be proven why they are call Laws.

          Then the ‘Laws of Survival’ take over and the last time I checked about being tossed into waters with alligators waiting with wide-open maws, well, the next ‘Law of Nature’ comes into play and involves Darwin and his survival-of-the-fittest, which, I believe is heavily weighted in the hungry alligators’ favor.

          Luckily we survived that drive and lived to write about it, but I am going to stand by my initial assessments and reactions to Alligator Bait Highway.

          Maybe someday you will be lucky enough not to have to drive this perpetually perturbing pathway to hell

           Meanwhile back at the ranch, we find our intrepid travelers pouring over maps and charts of all things westward……

          I will entice you with a short synopsis of our up-coming plans for traveling so that you have a heads-up as to what is coming up.

          For now, we are enroute to Sugarloaf Key, just a short hop this side of Key West.  On our way there we are stopping in Pensacola to visit with Kim, one of Paula’s high school chums and then we drop in on Barb, Paula’s sister, outside of Tampa.      

           From there it’s a few hours to the KOA on Sugarloaf where we’ll spend about five days before journeying up the east coast of Florida with stops in Vero Beah and around Palm Coast to visit some of Paula’s relatives.

          Then it’s back to Texas for the month of March to help Danny with his run for Justice of the Peace and to get ready for the start of the Great Circumnavigation of the Lower Forty-Eight Summer Tour and Homecoming.

          Our plan is to drive to Durango for a few days, and the head west to Las Vegas, Los Angeles area, Sequoia, Big Sur, Monterey, Yosemite, San Francisco, Lake Tahoe, Oregon, Seattle, Spokane, Montana, North Dakota, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Mackinac, (on the Upper Peninsula  of Michigan), down to  and over to Niagara Falls, Finger Lakes, Cooperstown, and finally arrive in New Jersey somewhere around mid-June.

          Stay tuned for lots of Posts as we work our way around this coming Traveling Season!

George Orwell’s Animal Farm has got nothing on us.

          I won’t pretend that our current positions as Farm Sitters has all of the allegory and satire that Orwell packs into Animal Farm but watching the hierarchical antics of the “Residents of the Corral” play themselves out gives us endless hours of entertainment.

          We are presently in charge of four horses, two goats, a dog, and about 14 billion stinging little red ants.

          Danny, Kaitie, and Madison are spending a week in Disneyworld and as any of you who has even a goldfish knows, you must find folks ready, willing, and able to tend your furry or finned friends if you would like to go away.

          For any amount of time.

          Since our initial Farm Sitter stay at Tomboy Farm in Durango, our list of credentials has grown nicely to the point where we could open a small business and travel around and Critter Sit while others took their vacations!

          We are currently Certified in Chickens, Goats, Cats, (even felines with diabetes) horses, and dogs.

          Getting back to the endless hours of Entertainment from the Barn Brats led to me finding out that I now hold the unenviable post of Corral Control and Peace Officer.

          The backstory,

          As soon as two or more Critters are confined together, they start to work on who the Top Dog, Goat ,Chicken, Horse, etc. etc. is.

          This is one of those Laws of Nature.

          Who is bigger?

          Who is more aggressive?

          But, maybe, it’s ….

          Who is smarter?  

          Originally there were only two small horses here. Rose (the Mom) and Lilly (her daughter). They’re pretty cute and are actually smaller than ponies.

          Rose is kind of cuddly.

           Lilly is a bitch.

          So, it’s not hard to imagine who the boss is (was) in the corral, Lilly even bossed the two goats, Chones and Abigail around. In this case, Chones is the dominant one, which leaves poor Abigail at the absolute bottom of this Totem Pole.

          Enter Mystique.

          As soon as the trailer door opened, Rose and Lilly had fits!

          It was incredibly obvious who was gonna be Big Girl on Campus now! Mystique stands between 15 or16 hands high which makes poor Lilly and Rose look like Chihuahua’s around a Great Dane.

          Sure enough, when Mystique’s ten-day quarantine (she did not wear a mask) ended and they were all thrown together, she quickly cemented her status as Queen of the Corral, much to Lilly’s dismay. Rose could have cared less because she was already second horse, so what if she dropped to third? Rose now had the pleasure of watching her bitchy daughter be put in her place by the new Number One!

(Waylon, the new fourth horse is presently in his quarantine, and will be released soon. The plot thickens!)

          Lilly is presently making a spectacle of herself. She knows that she used to be on top and is obsessed with getting some of her lost respect back. It’s like watching the kid on the playground who used to be Top Dog until the New Kid comes to town, Now he spends all his time trying to sidle up to the New Kid, only to be rebuffed again and again.

          The others are watching this process with glee.

          At no time is this more obvious than at Feeding Time.

          There are no stalls here to confine them into so that they can eat in peace. Nope, its every horse for themselves!

          Luckily (for Rose and Lilly) the Caretakers (us) are smart enough to put the food out in two different locations far enough apart that when Mystique decides that she would like to have some of the other hay, Lilly and Rose nonchalantly stroll over to the pile that Mystique just abandoned.

          This goes on for hours.

          Sometimes Lilly just stands and stares at Mystique munching away,  dreaming of a long-lost past when she had the run of the hay! Now she has to be content with sharing with Rose who does not seem to let her emotions cloud her judgment when it comes to the food.

          She just goes to the other pile.

          Now enter the rain.

          Not just any rain,

          Texas rain.

          There is only one shelter in the corral and while it is certainly large enough to fit everyone in it, it is definitely not large enough for one bully and two meek cuties.

          This is not usually an issue. Horses can be out in the rain and do so happily if said rain is moderate.

          Not Texas Rain.

          Yesterday we had Texas Rain and it was obvious that the critters were getting uncomfortable. Mystique high-tailed it into the shelter as soon as it started.

          Rose and Lilly tried to just sort of, kinda, look-the-other-way, amble close to, but not quite enter the shelter, waiting for Mystique to shoo them away.

          They were not disappointed.

          Well, I guess that they were disappointed because they did not get into the shelter.

          On the first try.

          Then, just maybe, Queen Mystique took some pity on her vassals and acquiesced without giving any of her dominance way.

          She just ignored them.

          Rose was the best one to watch. She stood out in the rain until inch by inch, hoof by hoof, she backed herself neatly into the shelter not even once glancing in Mystique’s direction.

          It could have been one of those posts on Instagram where they dub in the animals talking!

          But the best is yet to come.

          Now it’s Feeding Time.

          We could have put their hay out in the usual places, and they would have come out of the shelter and ate it,

          Albeit reluctantly (and miserably).        

          So, we decided to try and press our luck and feed them inside the shelter, in opposite corners, but still within a tail’s swish of each other.

          The tensions mounted as I entered that corral with hay piled high in my arms, The neighing and whinnying commenced immediately as Mystique rushed over to me and tried to wrestle the hay away from me. Turning my back to her I entered the shelter and put half down in one corner.

          She was there in a heartbeat.

          Now, some in the other corner.

          I could see Lilly and Rose were in a quandary.

          They’ve never eaten this close to the Big Girl before .

          Eying the other pile of hay, they slowly walked towards it until Mystique decided that she wanted the other pile too! Lilly and Rose retreated quickly spooking Mystique who found herself in the confined area of the shelter and kicked her way out!

          Now everyone was outside, and everyone wanted to be inside.

          Rose and Lilly saw their chance and went for it until Mystique got her wits about her and re-entered the fray.

          Out came Lilly and Rose!

          Now I’m getting worked up!

          This is where I discovered that even the bully can be put in their place!

          With lots of hand gestures and name calling (their real names, not those other names!) I managed to make them understand that the piles were separate and that there was plenty for everyone and I wanted them to eat in peace.

          Sort of.

          Well, anyway, that’s how I remember it.

          I felt like Henry Kissinger at Camp David trying to get the Peace Talks going and get everyone at the same table.

          And here is the photo to prove it.

          I look like the Hall Monitor in high school.