Back where I come from…

“Y’all have a nice day, Bye now.”

          These were the words uttered by the grocery clerk who bagged our order down at the H.E.B. grocery store, an exceptionally large, family owned and operated grocery chain and food manufacturer here in Texas. Uttered may be the wrong verb to use here because he said it clearly, with that “look you in the eye” confidence that can only come from someone who means what they say.

We “utter” those types of farewells back in the East also:

          “See ya”

          “Ciao” (I have never met an Italian who said this to me)

          “Peace out” (I have said this only to younger co-workers who just grin and shake their heads at me)

          “Toodles” (to be used after having Brunch at an up-scale café)

          “Hasta la vista!” (you can only use this one only if you can imitate Arnold’s accent and if you want to feel extra cool, pause and  add        ‘baby’ to the end of it.)

          And the ever popular, I’m just saying this because my company      policy says I have to, “Thank you for shopping at Walmart, have a nice day”

          Not one of these farewell expressions comes close to a “good-bye” spoken by someone with one of those wonderful southern accents. Make no mistake about it, Southern Hospitality is a genuine, every day, reach out and touch you, way of life down here. There is no question that the pace of life is a tad slower when you get away from the Northeast. Even when piloting the grocery cart in the store it is noticeable. At Shop-Rite, you’d best have your shoulder pads and gear on when going in on a busy day to do battle with the masses.

          Not here.

          I am almost embarrassed when I think that I have accidentally cut some one off or pass them on the way to the register. Everyone lets the other person go first. There is no battling for position. Just give way with a smile and a nod. And it is s l o w e r , sometimes maddingly so, until you realize that all is good, people are friendlier, and we will all get finished in due time.

           It is not a race.

          Here.

          Back in New Jersey, it is a badge of honor when you can take down the person with the large order and beat them to the check-out lane.

          Ha! I won!

          Let’s go back to accents. We all know what a Southern accent sounds like. Most of the time we only get an exaggerated form of it while watching television or a comedy sketch. To listen to this type of speech is like listening to butter melt on a serving of homemade mashed potatoes. I could listen to Loretta Lynn recite the phone book and would not care one little bit. Maybe if I am lucky, I can pick up a few stray syllables and work them into my speech patterns. Alas, probably not, I have been back East for too long. We have accents back East, all as colloquial as they come.

          Boston, Brooklyn, Maine, Joisey……

          Joisey…..    New Joisey?

          Did you know that no one in New Jersey has that accent, we don’t say Joisey. It is one of those annoying, pervasive things that get hung on anyone from New Jersey. But that’s ok, we can take it. My daughter has  tee-shirt that she wears . She lives in Durango, Colorado. The shirt has emblazoned on it:

                                      New Jersey

                             Only the Strong Survive

          When folks ask her about it her reply is, “If I have to explain it, you won’t get it.”

          Her other favorite is,

                             Welcome to New Jersey

                                      Now Get Out!

A far cry from Southern Hospitality, wouldn’t you say?

          But we do have an accent,

          The other day when we were down visiting Emma at the Voter Registration Office, Emma’s co-worker looked up from her desk and said to Paula,

          “Honey, I just love your accent!”

          Go figure.