Author: donhall930

Yesterday was a REALLY big day!

We got married!

            Well….. kinda/sorta …

                        More on that a little later

            Our goal for the day was a town way up north, close to the Chinese border. The town is Sapa and we will be here for a few days. It is a “resort” town, far up in the hills. We are to meet some of the Hill Tribes up here, who are vastly different from the folks we met the other day. These Tribes have their own languages, some based on Mandarin, but they cannot communicate with each other as they are still so different. That shows how far back the heritage of these people goes, back when they migrated from further into ancient China. For practical reasons, they do speak the local Viet language, but their local dialects are still identifiable with this region.

            On our way up there we stopped at a local cinnamon farm. One of the aspects of traveling with O.A.T. is their desire and capability of bringing us into the lives and business of the local population where we get to sit and converse, not just breeze through and end up at the gift shop. And the size (small) of our group allows us to get off the beaten path, you know, the one that the large tour busses follow. Our bus is this cute thing that holds maybe twenty-four but we’re only fourteen so we are all quite comfortable 😊.

            Being the big drinker that I am I was pleasantly surprised to experience a tradition of having a shot of whiskey (be it rice, grain, or apricot (?) at our introductions! Along with the accompanying toast of “Zoo!” (Cheers! Salut! Prost! etc.) I can guarantee you that I have consumed more liquor in the past few days than I have probably had in a few years! (Maybe that helps explain the beginning of this Post!)

            Back to the cinnamon…. so, cinnamon comes from the bark of the tree, and it needs not be a hundred years old to produce it. Six or seven years old is just fine so sustainable growth is quite easy…. At least the sustainable part, you still have to farm it and that takes laborious labor! We drove for gazillions of miles surrounded by cinnamon forests. That is good because cinnamon is my favorite spice and now, I don’t have to worry about it going away!

            After the cinnamon farm we drove about another hour to the border city of Lao Cai where we had a delicious lunch and visited the Crossing. Here we could see China on the other side of the Nam Thi River. Here we watched members of the P.S.A.C.V. (Professional Smugglers Association of China and Vietnam) whisk their ill-gotten booty across the border with nary a whimper of protest. The reason for this dates back to Biblical Times when Noah and his crew bought off the guards on Mount Ararat in order to get the animals off the Ark without the proper permits and vaccinations. Today we call it Graft and Corruption. But you can pick up a microwave for a song!

                        We exited the Walmart of Border Crossings and headed out to our destination, Sapa, elevation 5,413 feet. We needed to climb up one of the windy roads that never seem to end or stop having curves. This is no deterrent for our illustrious bus driver (or any of the other drivers for that matter) as passing routinely goes on whether you can see around the blind curve hovering above the precipitous drop-off……. or not. Passing slower vehicles and hugging the rails is quite normal and it all seems to go just fine until the roads get too small for our “smaller” bus. We finally had to transfer to a cozier van/bus in order to proceed.

Here is where we met out Local Guide Mei (May). She is from the Ta Phin village, one of the Red Dao People. This is another part of the puzzle that O.A.T. puts into place…. Local Guides. It would be like a group of foreign tourists coming over to the USA and I was their Tour Leader (our Phil), but we were going to spend a day in Brooklyn. Now I’ve been to Brooklyn, but wouldn’t it be better to have Vinny hop on with us and bada bing! really show us his homeland? “Hey! I’m walkin’ here!

You betcha!

                        We arrived at the point where our new driver needed to put the vehicle in reverse and back up probably a quarter of a mile on a muddy, non-paved road because there was no room up above to turn around. Did I forget to mention the weather? Well, it was damp and foggy…. really foggy! And this maneuver needed to be done precisely so we did not get all verklempt and get stuck. As an aside, maybe it was a good thing that it was foggy because we could not see over the side of the cliffs that we were navigating and see down into the abyss below.

Maybe.

            We arrived at Mei’s home to meet her family and have some (hic!) more whiskey. This is when the fun started…. it was all quite innocent I can assure you. The conversation revolved around growing up here, the arranged marriages, dowries, and just general living. Mei had on traditional clothing as did her mom and relatives. We were informed that the girl needs to be able to make her own wedding dress and when we asked to see it, it was proudly brought out for all of us to admire.

The embroidery was just magnificent, and the patterns are traditional from family to family. Mei offered for the women to try on her headdress and the ladies in our group jumped at the chance for this fun photo-op. I got up from my stool when it was Paula’s turn and took a few pictures of her and that’s all I remember. The next thing I know is having Mei putting the male version of the headdress on me, wrapping it around my head and then leading me over by Paula. We were instructed to do some bowing in several directions (to ancestors and the like) and then to each other. Next thing I know Mei pronounces us married.

                                    I swear that’s how it happened.

Yesterday could be one of those days that are so completely satisfying that we could have left and came home and all would be good.

                        I’ll explain in a bit, first an apology for something that I have no control of and that is the weather. While the lack of sunshine and the abundance of photo-starving cloud cover is natural, the photo-guy inside me is as frustrated as can be and feels the need to just mention something about it!

                        OK…. now I feel better!

                        Another mentionable item…. While we are visiting several of the indigenous peoples that have lived here for a long time, please don’t think that they are primitive. We are not on a remote island somewhere off the coast of another far-flung place that no one has visited and the tribes have not had any contact with the outside world.

Quite the opposite.

While these areas are definitely agrarian in scope, and some “beasts of burden” are still being used, there is ample evidence of a more modern technology being utilized. Take for example, this Travel Post. Without a really good wi-fi connection I would not be able to upload all of the photos, access the website utilities and then publish this mess.

            That’s just one example. While clinging to traditions remains a central part of these folks’ lives, they are not backward in any way and as they become more acquainted with some of the more modern ways and technologies that do make life a little easier, well…. who could blame them for taking full advantage of them?

            Not me! My argument would be if you really have a problem with coming here and not being able to see people sitting around a fire and chanting some guttural language while skinning a water buffalo for dinner, then I suggest that YOU come over and live that life!

            It’s like when people would come to me when we were selling the Chatterbox and would complain that it was going away. I would explain that no one came forward to purchase it as a restaurant and so the property was going to be something else. They would still go on and on until I suggested that they could purchase it from us and keep it the same.

            Their reaction was always the same…

            “What! Do you think I’m crazy!!!???”

            I rest my case and digress…..

            I hope that I’ve made a point about expectations when visiting unique places around the world. What we do look for is the people themselves and their outlook on their lives and where they see themselves in this ever-shrinking world that we live in. Homogenization would be an appropriate word to use here; it is pervasive wherever you travel and it is getting worse (depending on your outlook). Maybe that in itself is a good reason to travel as soon as you can! I’ll quote Captain Woodrow Call in Lonesome Dove who realized back in 1876 that things would not remain the same for long….. saying, “I wanna do it Gus, I wanna see that country before all the bankers and lawyers all git it.”

Hence their cattle drive to the wilds of Montana.

At the start of this Post I mentioned that it was a good day, and it was rather fulfilling. We went on a three-hour walk through the countryside and its villages, meeting people along the way. Friendly would be an understatement the way that we were always greeted. We spoke to all of the farmers and tradesman that we encountered, all adding just a little color to this palette of life that embodies this region.

One of the main destinations was the home of a local Veteran of the Vietnam War. (Just for perspective, they call it the “American War”.) We were invited to all come into his home where we met his family and we all had tea. Phil gave us an overview of Mr. Hein’s life, how he was affected by Agent Orange and his other military experiences.

            Being able to put politics aside and have a meaningful discussion about a mutual past was quite exhilarating and sobering at the same time. Being able to hear the “other side’s” perspective was rather satisfying. Listening to someone who once was the “enemy” talk about fighting for independence and protecting their homelands rang a little close to home. Boiled down, the Vietnamese people have been subjugated for thousands of years under the Chinese, Japanese, and French, way before the USA became involved. We were there to stop the threat of Communism, which at that time was so diametrically opposed to our ways that there was no “seeing” the other side.

I am not going to stay on this topic and defend one way or the other, but the fact that we were sitting in this man’s home, drinking tea with him, speaking about a horrible subject and seeing him smile at describing his life and family make us realize that there is always another side to a story.

            I left there quite moved by the simple fact that this opportunity was dropped at our feet and we elected to pick it up and run with it. This kind of travel may not be what everyone is looking for, but it is available if someone were interested.

            And don’t get me wrong here, I am totally looking forward to the next cruise that drops us in port for a few hours and we get to come back aboard for a nice steak and lobster dinner!

The ‘free time’ on this trip is not anything like being on a Cruise!

We are on the go (so far) most of the day, but then, we didn’t come here to just sit around. Hence, my ‘reporting’ time to work on this Blog is much smaller than usual! Forgiveness please!

            The day before yesterday we spent at a museum in Hanoi dedicated to the 54 different ethnicities that exist here in Vietnam. Phil recommended that we experience than before venturing up into the Hills for the next few days when we would visit several of those ethnicities or tribes. Thankfully Phil was there to interpret all of what we saw in the museum, being able to put it in context and then compare them all to each other learning their differences and similarities, which depended on where the particular tribe traced its origins to.

Here are some of the rules having to do with driving/walking/or being run over on the streets.

            A. There are no rules

            B. If you try and follow any rules you will be run over.

            C. The horns work just fine over here.

            D. The one with the loudest horn wins.

            E. Swerving is an artform.

            F. There are thousands of “Artists” here.

            G. Sidewalks are for the parking of scooters.

            H. Streets are for the parking of larger vehicles, wherever you want to.

J. Pedestrians are moving targets that are to be avoided, but only by enough to cause heart attacks.

K. Intersections are high-speed free-for-alls to be navigated with horns and accelerator pedals only!

If you can adhere to these guidelines then you will survive nicely!

Overland to the Mai Chau Valley and Pom Coong

   Yesterday we ventured out of the city, headed way up to the north and west of Hanoi, into the Hill Country to have the opportunity to visit some indigenous folks and experience their customs. Now, I believe that a clarification is in order here…. we will not be gathered around a fire with a boiling cauldron over it wondering what (or who) is in the soup! No different than our own indigenous peoples, modern times have infiltrated their daily lives, but still, they try their nest to cling to some of their traditions and customs, keeping their heritage alive. And turning that Heritage into a very sustainable form of tourism. The issue for anyone would be to try and sift through these experiences and separate the wheat from the chaff and not get bamboozled and then end up buying the plastic dinosaur made in China. Here is where our Tour Group comes in as Overseas Adventure Travel excels in this kind of experience as we and you will soon find out!

On our way to the village, we stopped at a broom ‘factory’ on the side of the road. Each broom sells for about a dollar. The average income of a Vietnamese worker is about $600.00 per month.

After a delicious dinner that included some interesting rice whiskey, we were entertained by some local young folk with traditional dances and music.

A visit to another village is in store for tomorrow before we return to our hotel in Hanoi.

Thanks for traveling with us…. lots more to come!

So guess what happens when your flight is delayed and you miss your connection and they book you onto another flight the next day and that flight is with another airline because they don’t fly to where you’re going and your baggage is already checked through to that city and its not getting there by the original airline and they keep it overnight and you’ve got to get to the airport early the next day and find a line that is gargantuan in length filled with countryfolk and every belonging that they can possibly jam on, and into, giant cardboard boxes that are wrapped and taped to survive a drop from 37,000 feet up and you realize that there is no way to stay there and get anything accomplished and then you wheedle your way onto the line with only two people on it and plead your case with the nice desk lady with your baggage stubs from the original flight waving frantically so they can run down stairs and get Quasimodo to find your two bags and scurry them over to the new airline so that they can be on your new flight to Hanoi?

                        Did you guess that the bags made it onto that flight, or did you guess that the bags are still in Tokyo? *

                        Tune in tomorrow to find out if our Intrepid Travelers are re-united with their underwear or…… not!

* Fun Fact…… did you know that Tokyo is as far away from Hanoi as New York is from San Francisco?

 Who’d a thunk that!!!???

So….. yes, it’s a six-hour flight on Vietnam Airlines…… but this time we’re in Coach…. with the crates of chickens and other livestock….. and whatever else could not be jammed into those cardboard boxes…..

Only kidding! Vietnam Air had one of most spotless aircraft that I’ve ever been on and the most pleasant Cabin Crew to boot!

The flight went perfectly, the lunch was delicious, the movie selection incredibly large, and the two bags (who were on their very first trip as they are brandy-spankin’ new NOBL fancy travel cases) that should have been on that flight must have felt just slightly miffed at being squished between smelly old cardboard boxes because as it turns out, they stamped their little roller-feet and refused to be boarded.

They were left wailing and gnashing their teeth in Tokyo.

They will hopefully arrive today.

That means that we did get here yesterday! (or was it last week(?) because we did cross that incredibly confusing International Date Line and it’s tough to keep track!)

We’re at the hotel after fighting the lines at Immigration when we arrived. Apparently, everyone else in the known world decided to come to Vietnam yesterday afternoon. But no worries here as we finally overcame the queue (no cardboard boxes….yet, as we still needed to get to baggage (and cargo) claim. Our driver waited patiently outside for us and we were able to keep in contact using What’s App, an internet-based system similar to Face Time. 45 minutes later we were greeted by “Phil” (his real name is Phúc Nguyễn Hạnh) who could be one of the nicest people on the planet!

We were also greeted by Sherry from the Harold and Sherry duo and quickly whisked up to the rooftop bar for a few Baileys before dinner.

            Dinner was at a really neat little place about a block away with the rest of our group. Lively banter ensued as we all got acquainted with each other and Phil explained what were about to be served.

 I do not know what everything was.

I did eat everything.

Nothing looked suspicious, there were no extraneous crawly-type legs or bug eyes at all!

After dinner we all went back to the hotel and zonked.

More tomorrow.

To say that this trip started off on the right foot would be an understatement. Presently we find ourselves in the United Airlines Polaris Lounge which is reserved for passengers traveling exclusively in that Class. This is the one with those Personal Pods and Lay-Flat Snoozer Seats.

                        The ONLY aspects of this trip that are of any concern are the flying parts. NOT because I am afraid of flying, quite the opposite…. I’ve done aerobatics in a Stearman Bi-Plane, flew a WWII AT-6 and countless other cool aircraft courtesy of my Chatterbox partner Steve. I’ve even flown a 727! So, as you may surmise, flying is not the issue.

                        Sitting is the issue.

                        And for those of you that have known me for more than an hour or so, know my Restless Leg Syndrome (RLS) can be debilitating at times. This is an affliction that I do take medication for, and it is majorly effective….. most of the time. But sitting in an airplane row with limited room to move around, the Fasten Seat Belt sign glaring me in the face, and the guy who I am positive is the Air Marshall eyeing me up while secretly fingering the trigger on the howitzer hidden in his jacket.

            I hope that he uses it on me and puts me out of my misery.

                        You may think that this is an exaggeration…..

                        I can assure you that it is not!

                        It’s not that I won’t sit down, it’s that I can’t sit down.

                        And…. a full-blown Panic/Claustrophobic-type Attack may end up being the result.  Queue the Xanax.

            So, as you can surmise, seating on an aircraft is more important to me than most people. I always opt for the (now more expensive) exit row seats, because there is gobs of leg room there and the only extra thing that I need to do is help open the door, etc. in case of emergency. As an aside, I’m the guy that you really want there because even as a kid on the school bus I sat up front and studied all the controls and switches in case the driver was incapacitated, I would know what to do.

                        Another good spot is one of the bulkhead rows with no seats in front of you. Usually there is extra leg room there also. Occasionally I’ve been fortunate to scoff up a First-Class seat last minute when they just want to get a few more shekels out of someone willing to shell them out. This option comes with some other perks like FREE (all you can eat) snacks! And the good ones too…. endless Stroopwafels for your enjoyment!

                        Back to this flight. We did have a bulkhead seat with the middle one still unsold as of yesterday. Yahoo! But….. when I went on to check us in, there were some ‘offers’ to upgrade to Polaris Class. We had (just for fun) asked about this for the upcoming Baltic/Poland trip….. it was available for an extra $8500.00….uh…. no thanks. So, we never expected this to ever be an option.

                        But I think I’ve got this business figured out…. with absolutely no way to verify this theory:

                        Fact: there is no better industry than the airlines that have the down and dirty numbers on the amounts of passengers on a flight, i.e. how many open seats are available in any given class at any given time. They also know, just by the experiential numbers of past passengers, that ‘X’ percentage are willing to move seats, upgrade, cancel, etc.

            This all leaves them with an algorithm that dictates their moves, and motives, come a day or so before departure. Well, I guess that we hit that jackpot and there must have been enough open Polaris Class seats available that they knew that they needed to make a proposition that, as Don Corleone (Marlon Brando) so persuasively said, “I’m gonna make you an offer you can’t refuse!”

                        So, here we sit in the Polaris Class Lounge in the Houston Airport that is even better than the usual United Lounge (which is very pleasant in its own right!) having a very nice breakfast, just waiting to board and by now you’ve correctly surmised that we are not in our Economy Bulkhead seats but in fact in 10D and 10F which are in the middle row, both on the aisle,  and have a nifty Privacy Screen between them (if you don’t happen to know your neighbor!)

                        +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

                        Getting acclimated to these new surroundings is just a little daunting but we are not complaining! There are so many ‘amenities’ that are included with these seats that it seems a tad cluttered. Two blankets, two different pillows, a bag filled with toiletry-type items, slippers, and even pajamas upon request! Stashing all these things in spaces that we are unaccustomed to made getting boarded early almost a necessity, but it all worked out, things were squished into tight little spaces, or in some cases, folks just dove in, covered up and went to sleep. We had our Four-Course meal that was very good, and I can report to you that the Triple Chocolate Mousse cake is excellent!

                        But…… (here it comes)

                        I spoke too soon.

                        You know that it is not good when the Captain gets on the PA system when everything is running smoothly and there are no apparent problems. He was not talking to us to show us something out the windows. He was letting us know that we would be detouring to San Francisco for a “maintenance” issue. He said that we were in no danger now, but the correct course of action would be to address it before we headed out over the north Pacific Ocean. We have no idea what it is, how it may be fixed, whether we will need to de-plane or not, but in a short period of time I think that we’ll have some answers. I am quite sure that the folks on the ground are working diligently to mitigate any more negative circumstances.

                        In the meantime there is always some extra Xanax!

            Wait! Another announcement!

                        Blah-blah-blah blah…………

                        Well, we learned that we would be landing in San Francisco, the time, temp, and winds there, just as if it was our final destination! I wish that we had just a little more info!

                        ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

                        Remember back at the start of this Post I said that it was an understatement to say that we had started out on the right foot? I wish that I could take that back now, but only slightly, because these seats are AWESOME !!!!!

            But there is an excellent possibility that we are going to miss our connecting flight to Hanoi. Originally, we had about a three-hour layover and that buffer has been consumed by our detour to San Francisco when we had to make a hard left instead of the shorter route of going up over Alaska and then down to Japan, and don’t forget the time spent in San Francisco transferring to another plane. I do have to complement United on this swap of aircraft, we came into G-4, disembarked, walked two gates to G-2 where our identical aircraft was already waiting for us, and waited for the replacement cockpit crew to arrive. The whole shebang went off without a hitch, so that was the positive of the negative. It turns out that there was an issue with the air handling system. When the outside temps are hovering around negative 60 degrees, and close to 300 peeps are aboard all very inconsiderately breathing….. well I guess that the a/c unit is quite important and the judicious decision that was made was the correct one.

                        The confusing part right about now is determining what time it is. While the physical time set by a time Zone is easy to pinpoint, determining the “Feels Like” time is a little more difficult. We caught the 6:30 jitney bus over to the airport and started to board around 9:30.   After flying North Westward for about two hours, we made that hard left to get San Franscico. I re-set my watch there for West Coast time which didn’t really make too much of a difference. BTW, at that time, the Tokyo time was something that I can’t configure as my real time now feels like about 2:30 am and I can barely keep my eyes open. I checked the In-Flight Guidance System on the video screen in front on me and it seems that we are due south of Anchorage, Alaska, headed to cross the Aleutian Islands soon and we still have 6 hours and 39 minutes to go, but who’s counting!   (And that’s just to Tokyo!)

                        Wait! I’ve got it figured out! Right now, it is 8:50 pm in Texas, 11:50 AM (tomorrow) in Tokyo and Hanoi is two hours earlier at 9:50 AM cuz it’s further West of Tokyo and an additional seven-hour plane ride which we won’t know if we’re going to make until we actually arrive in Tokyo.  

                        I think that I’ll end this blathering missive of a Post because I’m getting punchy and I am having quite the time backspacing the random letters that appear because I fall asleep with my finger on a letter and make about five rows of them before I get startled awake. When it gets Posted, only time will tell, as a regular schedule I have yet to establish. 

 Good night for nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

                                                                                                                                                                                               

(Many hours later)      

PS Arrived in Tokyo, staying at a nifty hotel, the Hotel Nikko Narita courtesy of United. I have to say that United was very organized and accommodating when we arrived. They had big tables all set up at the end of the jetway and staffed accordingly. Our Vouchers and our new flight arrangements were all there waiting for us. The hotel is magnificent and we’ll be back at the airport (only 5 minutes away) early tomorrow morning!

TWO WEEKS TO GO!

This year’s upcoming Expeditions to all points of the compass!

Here is a summary for reference, some compact details follow.

                        1/28 – 2/28   Viet Nam & Cambodia

                        2/28 – 4/5      Texas

                        4/9 – 5/4         NJ/ Poland /NJ

                        5/5 – 7/14      NJ

                        7/15 – 8/1       Iceland/Svalbard/Norway (Cruise)

                        8/2 – 8/7         NJ

                        8/7 / 8/15       Alaska Cruise

                        8/16 – (?)        NJ for a few days, then we pack up and head West via the U.P., Minneapolis, Montana, Oregon, then pick our way South and East, stopping in Durango before heading back to Texas.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++

In exactly Two weeks we will be winging our way to Viet Nam and Cambodia via Tokyo. This event signals the start of our Travel Season to which all of you are invited to tag along on. Same rules apply, passports up to date, inoculations complete, you must check with the Class Mother for your room assignments and on this particular journey, I cannot vouch for the bathroom facilities cuz they do things different over there. I hope that my thighs can hold up!    

                        This trip will last exactly a month, from January 28^th to February 28^th, after that we will be back in Texas until we start our Northern Migration in early April. This is a little earlier than usual and the reason will be apparent in a few more sentences. This Migration will most likely follow the usual Migratory Route of a Black and Gray Southern Winnebago –  Dormiens vehiculum winnebagious (mature). Going on twelve years old now, our specimen of this species is getting just a little tired and as so, usually finds convenient resting places along the route. These stops are often located next to suitable food sources for a more contiguous and easy respite.

                        We are exiting Texas just a little earlier than usual because we need to be in New Jersey in order to exit quickly in the opposite direction from Viet Nam. We board in Newark on April 13^th (!) and fly to Poland and the Baltic Capitals where we will stay until May 4^th. Both this one and the previously mentioned Viet Nam one are not Cruises! These will be our first experience with traveling with a “Tour” and with Overseas Adventure Travel (O.A.T.) in particular.

                        On these trips will be Harold and Sherry (Florida) from the World Cruise. One of the greatest aspects of that World Cruise (besides the Cruise and Ports themselves) was that we made good friends along the way and you have all been able to meet them (at least virtually) in this forum as we have kept in contact with them and visited with them from time to time. Darla & Sandra (Florida and the Upper Peninsula) Steve & Sandi (Oregon and Palm Springs) and Brian & Kristine (Oregon – and they happened to do a ‘drive-by’ in Durango on one of their road trips!)

                        Harold and Sherry have been on probably close to 30 tours with OAT and have raved about them from the get-go. One of the nice aspects of this outfit is that the group is limited to about 15 participants, and they emphasize the local cultures to the point where we will be staying overnight in a host home, learning about them and their customs, and even getting to cook a local dish with them. As you know, we love cruising, and cruises have tons of advantages, but one of the negative aspects of cruising is that it is almost impossible to really experience deep-down local traditions.

From all the reports , this will be just the opposite and we can’t wait!

March and the beginning of April will be spent in Texas where the Bluebonnets will be in full bloom and are definitely a sight to behold!  I think that here is an ordinance or something because no one (even the road crews) do not wow during Bluebonnet season. The roadsides are filled for weeks at a time, and the sight never gets tiring!

                        Next stop is back up to NJ, where we will ‘stay’ until mid-August. Actually, only the motor home will stay, as we have three more trips emanating from there. Our first one will be that OAT trip to Poland and the Baltic Capitals. We were in Tallin, Estonia back in 2017 whilst on a Princess Baltic Cruise and just wanted to stay there. Now we’ll have the chance to spend more than a few hours in a place that we always wanted to return to 😊.

                        Our next exit will be another Cruise, this time with Viking. We will fly to Reykjavik board one of their Ocean Ships, the Neptune, two ports in and around Iceland, then over to Svalbard (which is the furthest northern inhabited place on the planet) definitely the Land of the Midnight Sun, then its over to the west coast of Norway, down to Bergen, and then back to NJ. We’re in NJ for just a few days until we fly the other way (West!) up and over to Anchorage where we board the Discovery Princess for  a cruise down to Vancouver. Paula is taking her family on this cruise, a chance to get everyone together at the same time. It should be memorable!

                        That’s the end of the International Itinerary, but the home-grown travel is just starting! The stops may vary, depending on….. but it’s all for fun and you should have a blast, just like us!

See you at the Airport!

Last New Year’s Eve was spent in Montevideo, Uruguay aboard the Majestic Princess.

This  New Years’ Eve was spent in the parking lot of the Cracker Barrel of Bristol, Tennessee aboard the SS Winnebago.

No complaints…..

Just comparing…..

Our hasty exit from the frozen tundra of Northwestern New Jersey proved to be a wise decision albeit fraught with the detritus of that choice, namely we did not get to visit with everyone that we had planned on spending time with.  And that was the reason that we ventured northward to begin with!

We are now in the parking lot of the Cracker Barrel of West Monroe, Louisiana where it is currently 58 degrees and it is 2:20 AM! When we went to sleep it was a balmy 70! These temps, while very comfortable for us, are even more satisfying for Miss Biggie who wallows in delight whenever we do not have to run extra electric heaters in her belly in order for her innards not to freeze!

                        And…. it will be markedly easier to work on that power cable that went POOF a few days ago. It is obviously made from rubber and plastic, neither of which are very obliging when the temperature is down in the Uncooperative Range. I can’t wait to land at our Texas Home Base midday today, pull that cable out of its compartment and let it sit in the sun for 30 seconds after which it will be as pliable as a pack of Twizzlers left on your dashboard on a sunny day!

                        Driving yesterday, New Year’s Day, was about as pleasurable as long-distance driving can get. Minimal everything, cars, trucks, no construction, throw in some bright sunny weather and we had a great day on the road. We packed 735 miles into about twelve hours of driving, and we even gained an hour when we exited Georgia and entered Alabama. This is the stuff you don’t think about….. take a look at the map in your phone. Go ahead, I’ll wait……… now draw a line northward from the top corner where Georgia and Alabama meet and follow it up until you almost hit Chicago! It’s that far west! Who’d a thunk that?

                        You’ve probably noticed that we’ve spent more and more time at Cracker Barrels than Walmart’s. This is deliberate and somewhat a matter of overnight self-preservation. Back in the day, when old man Sam Walton was still alive, he decreed that the traveling public, i.e. RV’s, motorhomes, etc. were welcome to spend the night in ANY of his parking lots. A certain decorum was asked, please keep it clean, don’t “set up camp” and just be overly courteous in your deportment. This worked for quite a while until Sam went to that Super Walmart in the sky and the powers that claimed his throne were not as adamant about the Traveling Public. They left it up to the local managers to make the decisions on this topic and as the Nasties proliferated and trashed a few parking lots….well, you can guess what happened. More than a handful of Walmart’s became Anti-Overnighter’s and posted their decisions on the light poles outside. So, it is a spin of the proverbial roulette wheel as to who allows it and who doesn’t.

                        Now….. on the other hand, we have Cracker Barrels who have actual extended-length parking spaces for RV’s and busses. These extra-large spaces are not only to park and have a meal but are also available to spend the night in the lot! It is a lot less stressful knowing that at closing time there won’t be a knock on the door with the Mall Cop asking you to vacate the premises. We always go inside for a meal (dinner or breakfast) ask for the manager, introduce ourselves as the Overnight Parking Surveillance Team and thank them for their hospitality.

                        Since we went to bed around 6:45 and I’m up now, I have a feeling that we will get another rather early start on the road. We have about another five-plus hours in front of us before we can throw out the anchor again, but when we do, the temperature is forecast to be about 84.

                        But who’s counting.

Back in 1959, a not-so-young folk singer named Pete Seeger borrowed some verses from the Bible (Ecclesiastes 3:1-8) and used them as the basis for a song that we now all know. Sung at countless weddings and funerals, and popularized by the Byrd’s in 1965, Turn, Turn, Turn has become a staple of accepting and understanding that all occurrences have, and go in and out of, their Season.

                        For us, this chant could not be more true.

                        ‘A time to drive and a time to pull over’

                        ‘A time to Walmart and a time to Campground’

                        ‘A time for ‘singing’ tires and a time for slow driving’

                                    And now…..

                        ‘A time to visit and a time to throw in the frozen towel’.

            For all the right reasons, we elected to toss some carefully considered caution to the winds and drive our Home northward for this Season. We weighed all the factors, positive and negative, and after figuring out that:

                                    Most NJ winters don’t usually ‘start’ until later.

                                    It almost NEVER snows for Christmas

                                    And even if it does, the temps are usually mild

                                                Plus…

                                    Flying during this time of year can be a challenge, and once we arrived there would be the need to rent a car for almost a month (BIG bucks!), kindly accept the many offers we had to ‘stay at our place’ which would be fine as there were many and we hopefully would not stay too long at any one hospitable location, but, we’d still need to find vittles as it would not be acceptable for any of our host’s to always feed us!

                        So….. after weighing all of these factors (and many more minuscule ones) we decided to pull up the chassis jacks, drop ‘er into ‘Drive’, and head North.

                        That first encounter with Miss ‘Temps that Haunt You’ when it dropped to 9 degrees in Tennessee on our second day on the road, should have been an Indicating Factor that we had maybe made the wrong decision. But that dye had been cast and after our frozen brakes were duly repaired, we forged on, hoping against hope that our fortune, and the weather, would take a turn for the better.

                        It did not and we didn’t either.

                        You all know how much we love living in our Rolling Castle, but we do need to admit that these Shoeboxes on Wheels are really not designed for extended stays in frigid climates.

                        We tried our best, we kept our water hose drained and in the warm so that we could just string it out, fill our tank, and use the 90 gallons that are tucked away in our belly. The reverse is a little more challenging as those 90 gallons (plus ‘other things’) turns into even more waste and that needs to be periodically emptied. Well, we cannot keep ‘those’ hoses inside with us, so frigid, frozen, unyielding (think your garden hose but 10 times wider) left outside in the winter and you are going to try and use it! Oops!

                        Then there is just the basic Coldness. We have heat but our propane tank is only 23 gallons, large enough for cooking and hot water, but definitely not large enough to keep us warm for this extended time period. So, we have several of those small ceramic electric heaters strategically placed. These require that item that we have all come to take for granted, Mr. Electricity.

                        This is the element that brought us to the Point of No Return, or that Frozen Towel that was introduced a few paragraphs ago.

                        We took the motorhome over to our favorite Fixers, Campbell’s in Lafayette yesterday for some maintenance and when we returned and set ourselves back up here at Yetter’s, well let’s just say that the term “All Hell Broke Loose” came with its own manifestation of that most highly regarded aspect of that Netherworld….. FIRE!

                        I plugged us back into our 50amp service and went inside. Glancing out the window I spied the telltale signs of Things Gone Wrong. Smoke! By the time I exited, the power cord was putting on its own display of Holiday Lights complete with magnificent arcing, sparks galore, and Flames of Significant Proportions, as the wire itself caught fire and proceeded to melt nicely.

                        We do have multiple fire extinguishers readily available, and one was duly emptied onto the offending power cord with the desired results. But, alas, it was too late to save that plug and receptacle and they lay melted in the middle of the grass, never to be used again.

                        Unfortunate?…… undoubtably.

                        Traumatic?……. you betcha!

            This was our Hour of Reckoning. We had already seen the upcoming 10-Day Forecast, and it did not look promising, especially in the temp’s department. The thought of running the generator for that whole time was daunting, but I had already ordered a replacement plug from Amazon (hopefully here today) but still, that event took the wind out of our already slackened and frozen sails.

                        Summoning our chilly wits about us, we could hear Mr. Seeger softly singing a new verse in his Divinely Inspired song…..

“A time to stay and a time to go home”

                        We are taking their collective advice.

                        Now, borrowing a quote from another famous person, General Douglas MacArthur… “I (we 😊) shall return”!

Just like the swallows retuning to San Jaun Capistrano, come April (!) we will be rolling back up here and hopefully the Northeast will have been released from the clutches of Mama Natura and we won’t have any issues!

Because Claire in Minnesota told me that she needed an Update on our current condition…..

After two days of questionable luck, we arrived safely at Brian and April’s new home in Appomattox with no further trauma or drama. And because it was only about an hour and a half away, we decided not to hitch the Honda to the back of the motorhome. This facilitated a number of things…. it allowed me to pull into a fuel station of my choosing without worrying about the space needed for this giant bus and its tag-along. I still needed to service the hitch apparatus and it’s easier to do that when we’re parked somewhere where we won’t be in the way for a while, hence their driveway works just fine. And finally, without the car behind (and Paula sitting next to me!) I was able to really test out the repairs that were done on our air braking sysytem….. you know, I really put her through her paces! I was able to take corners on two wheels without Paula screaming in fright, I did a series of those high-speed, jam on the brakes, swing the wheel around, kind of turns that you see in good chase scenes on TV, and then to finish it off, the high-speed, straight line, jam on the brakes, and see if I can keep the whole thing going in that straight line.

The fact that I am seated here writing this Update will be proof enough that I was successful in all that was attempted! Except all that High-Speed stuff…. the fact that I am here is proof that I drove in the old Granny style that I usually do. If we want to make good time, Paula is the far better driver in getting us from A to B. DO NOT get in her way!

Our next (and final) stop will be in our reserved parking spot at Yetter’s Diner, Holiday Campground, and Taylor Ham, Egg, and Cheese Emporium in downtown Augusta, New Jersey! With any amount of luck that will be later on this afternoon as it is a relatively short jaunt to Northern New Jersey from here. We are planning on a (no-more-than) 9-hour excursion.

            Dateline: Roanoke, Virginia, in the parking lot of the Excel Truck Group, 3:05 AM     

I feel like I’m writing a Serial Piece as this will seem to be just a continuation of yesterday. Here goes:

                        “When we last left our Wayfaring Wanderers, they were trying to escape the grip of Mother Nature who was really pissed off because someone had left the freezer door open all night! This setting not only affected our heroes’ batteries but there was even more mayhem afoot as we check in on them today…. “

When using the term “On the Hook” in an idiomatic way, it usually refers to being responsible for something, especially something financial and/or being caught in a vulnerable / tense / dangerous situation.

                        In our lucky case we hit the Trifecta of Definitions because we are able to add a THIRD definition to this phrase using it as we transfer to a literal meaning …… you guessed it!

                                    Being ‘Towed” from the side of road! (Plus, in this case we get to retain the two previous definitions too, because this turned into a definitely tense/dangerous, and financially disruptive situation!)

                        And you thought that yesterday’s Post about Frosty Windshields was of questionable genesistical reporting!

            Scenario: Cold (very, as previously reported)….. this adverse condition had yet another victim waiting in the long shadows of a wintery day’s early morning hours …… our Brakes.

            “Ah, com’on Donny, we all drive around all day long in cold weather and we never have any ‘brake’ issues! They work just fine!”

            Well, that may be fine for you Mr. ‘Stopping Systems R’ Us’, but we use “Air Brakes” not the brake fluid type that you all use. This means that periodically moisture enters the system in the form of condensation, and we now understand what happens to said condensation when it encounters some really low temps!

                                    It freezes!

                                    And what do you think may be the bane of an ‘Air Brake’ system? Yup! Clogged (with ice) air lines and/or components of that system.

                                    “Well Donny, did you slam into the rear of that 18-wheeler in front of you? Or careen off of the side of the Interstate in one of those long, crazy turns in Virginia?

                        Sorry to disappoint you Mr. ‘Looking on the Bright Side’…. fortunately, we were able to discover this current malady before we ended up in the local papers.

                        As you may imagine, there are some gauges on the dash that monitor this brake system. We usually have well over 100 psi in the system. I noticed yesterday that we were lower, down around 75 or so. Being the worry-wort that I am, (you know, the guy hurtling down the road with the 28,000-pound rolling brick and a little car tagging along behind it) I called my “All Things Truck Related” Life-Line…. he is a former Over the Road Tractor-Trailer Driver, neighbor and all-around good guy with a very nice name…… Don (!)

                        He obviously always has good, solid advice for us.

                        He did not sound encouraging.

                        He told us that if that pressure drops to around 60 psi, then the brakes will automatically lock up and bring us to a (literal) screeching halt. Because….. that’s better than letting any more air escape to the point where you (us!) actually have ZERO stopping power and the Fred Flintstone maneuver just isn’t enough to bring us safely to the side of the road.

                        So, before we did any of the previously mentioned negativity we pulled over on the shoulder of I-81, just south of Roanoke, Virginia. A flurry of phone calls ensued…. first to Don, then to my guy Corbin up at Campbell’s in Lafayette (our repair facility) then to Andrew at the local Roanoke Freightliner fixers, and finally to the guy at Brown’s Towing who dispatched Ethan in one of those giant “Ice Road Truckers” trucks to save us. All of these guys were a pleasure to deal with, especially Ethan who needed to crawl under our motorhome, take apart the driveshaft and remove some other pieces of equipment that had the possibility of getting mushed when we were put ‘on the hook’.

                        Just an aside here: You will have tons more consideration for the broken-down vehicle on the side of a highway after you endure the whoooosh of the passing trucks and cars yourself! We always try to move over a lane when we see someone on the side of the road. You will notice all truck drivers do because they have experienced this at least once in their careers and it’s not fun. In fact, it’s downright uncomfortable! Never mind the safety factor! Unless of course, the traffic is considerable and there is no time/room to make that move over one lane then it’s just ‘hold on tight’!            

                                    That was our case yesterday. Unfortunately, soon after we pulled over, someone behind us opened the floodgates and poured so much additional traffic onto the highway that it was impossible for anyone to make their “Courtesy Move-Over” without putting their neighbor into the concrete median. So ‘rock on!’ was our mantra until Ethan hooked us up and extricated us from that situation. We followed our Home on Wheels as it was towed away and stopped when it was deposited at the Freightliner fixer, Excel Truck Group.

                        Now the third part of our Trifecta comes into play….. the financial one! We all know that dispatching a tow truck is a rather expensive deal. How about dispatching the giant ‘truck-that-can-tow-another-truck’ truck? Yea…. add some more to that estimate! It’s $450.00 per hour, three-hour minimum. Oh well, at least we are now safe in the parking lot of Excel Truck Group where they let us spend the night. They were closing up when we arrived, so we’re on the docket for this morning, but there are a few customers in front of us.

                        Stay tuned for the further adventures of Paula and Don in their continuing saga of Highways to Hell (and back)!

                        Hmm…. I wonder if I can get a credit for Overnight Parking Lot Surveillance because I haven’t slept a wink. Nah…. probably not, I should be thankful that they didn’t charge us for an over-night stay!

P.S.  As I write this, that Battery System is giving me fits, I’m glad(?) that I’m awake to monitor the issue. If it turns out to be any more calamitous than just batteries (like a new Inverter!) you will be able to hear our collective screams from the comfort of your own homes, wherever you may be!